Home » Thursday Re-View » Thursday Re-View — I’m Wearing Down to the Real

Thursday Re-View — I’m Wearing Down to the Real

[Quotes from “The Velveteen Rabbit” by Margery Williams]


Some days, getting older is a real drag (literally and figuratively)…the graying hair, the middle-aged spread, the skin spots, the forgetfulness, the sense of being either in the way or invisible to the younger generations…

…and on other days, getting older is tempered by the Velveteen Rabbit.

velveteen rabbit I

Let’s face it — I’m wearing down to the Real.

“Real isn’t how you are made,” said the Skin Horse.
“It’s a thing that happens to you..
When a child loves you for a long, long time,
not just to play with, but REALLY loves you,
then you become Real…It doesn’t happen all at once.
You become. It takes a long time.”

It has taken a long time, but sometimes it feels like overnight. Wasn’t it just a short time ago that I graduated from college, then optometry school? Set up my practice, got married, became a mother? In fact, when did I become my mother when I look in a mirror? (See: When Did I Start to Look Like My Mother?)

I’m wearing down to the Real.

“Generally, by the time you are Real,
most of you hair has been loved off,
and your eyes drop out
and you get loose in the joints
and very shabby.
But these things don’t matter at all,
because once you are Real,
you can’t be ugly except to people
who don’t understand.”

My hair is getting gray at the roots, my eyes haven’t dropped out but night-time driving in the rain is risky, and there’s a certain delayed reaction with certain joints — I get up but my body lags behind my head. If my joints aren’t cracking, they’re stiff.

But I’m wearing down to the Real.

Only authentic goods here.

My heart is bigger, my insight deeper, my tolerance wider, my amusement heartier, as I get worn down to a well-loved vehicle. And I hate to admit it, but I even have some shabby – or is it flabby – matronly moments, too.

“When you are Real, shabbiness doesn’t matter.”

But it’s taken me a long time to get to the Real Theresa…the reason-for-being, meaning and purpose in life, I can die and will have made a small positive difference Theresa who is comfortable in her own wearing out skin.

And that’s a good thing, because in wearing down to the Real,

“Once you are Real, you can’t become unreal again. It lasts for always.”

I’m wearing down to the Real.

I’m steeped in readiness.

And I am blessed, indeed.

velveteen rabbit


18 thoughts on “Thursday Re-View — I’m Wearing Down to the Real

  1. I wonder if I can ever be real since my owner died before I could feel real. No-one seems to want anyone else’s battleworn toy with greying hair, no squeaker, a big tummy and less fur than there used to be.
    xxx Massive Hugs xxx

  2. this really touched a chord within…. and so true are these sweet words i’ve always loved. dear little skin horse… i have days when i’m convinced i have disappeared to everyone but me and others when those most dear allow me to see me thru others eyes that shine up at me . thank you. 💙

  3. Blessed you are Theresa. When you ‘know’ the real, the other things are seen from such a beautiful place.
    A little like seeing something rare in the wild for the first time…something special and a moment to remember. Mark

  4. Old friends are nice because you remember each other the way you were, but can laugh together about your mutual shabbiness. Sometimes it’s hard when we shabbies have to move away from old friends, because all our younger selves are still there inside, but new acquaintances can’t see them, Wonderful post, thought provoking and uplifting and nostalgic. I found my “Velveteen Rabbit” book from years ago just yesterday. I shall reread it tonight. Thanks, Teresa.

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